something.

You never knew how much i loved you. You never knew how happy I was. I never knew how stupid I was to give you my heart. I knew that it had to end someday. But why so harshly? You embrace the fact that you  demolished my heart. You embrace the fact that you hurt someone...I don't think anything will ever be the same. You will just date my best friend or someone else. You won't even care how much it hurts to see you with her. Because you will love her and not me. You will care about her and not me. You will want her...and not me...I guess I deserve it because I did this to some other girl who does't deserve this kind of hell. The sad part is i don't even think it will effect you.You will smile and laugh about it because you know you are capable of having any girl you want. You have the personality to die for. The truth is those 6 cuts meant something. One of those stood for you. But..you never knew that. And I never planned on telling you because i know it will just hurt you. Were all those kind words just a cover up so I will never know the deadly truth? Or did you really mean it at the time? When it was all over,did you still mean that? Or do those feelings automatically end when you say its over?....

I need help....

Iv'e ben so sad lately...all my friends are fading away...everytime I talk to someone, they just leave....I just wish everything would be the same...I cant live like this...I love my friends so much and seeing them be depressed and leave is horrible....it hurts me so much....please, no one else leave! I beg you please! I love all of you guys and I almost lost half of my friends....I just feel like no one is there for me when I need them the most...

R.I.P. Alexis

Im so glad not to be depressed anymore. Im temporarily injured because of my best friend,Alexi's death. Rest in peace Alexis. You were like my sister and even though I was barely ever there in the end, I always loved you. And now that your gone...I can't stop crying from time to time. So many things remind me of you! Like techno,I know you loved techno...It makes me cry...You will be missed and you really should belive me because you really fucking will. I think your spirit has visited me a few times...one time I was in my room doing my homework and the door opened slowly and I shut it than a minute later,it opened slowly again. Don't be afraid to com in and go next to me. I dont bite haha! Well,ilysfm Alexis and rest in peace...bye.

Important.

To those of you who think emo is all bullshit. Apparently you don't understand what depression can do to some people. Like a broken heart feels so horrible. It's like theres maggots inside your chest eating away at your heart, slowly. And it hurts your lungs. When you breathe it's your lungs are sore. Your sides feel like someone is cutting into them and with every minute the knife goes and inch deeper.Honestly I would much rather dying then go through that. I got rid of depression. How? I realized my ex was just a peice of shit who treated me like garbage and never cared. Trust me, I used to believe I would never get over this depression. But now,I'm happy and free from this deep pain. It almost killed me. If anyone at all feels like they want to kill themself, just remember, life isn't as short as you think. It's pretty damn long. Do you want depression to rule the rest of your life or are you going to fight back?
<3 Anna

I think I cut a little too deep this time....

Fuck the word thingy for now...Last night I cut a scene dimond and a heart into my skin. It hurts like hell. :(

Video Time!!! ^-^

Okay so I'm goanna put some or a funny video. :)

That is the torrets guy yelling at cats. >:)

Ronald McGod damn Donald :)

And  this is the last video :) Enjoi! n_n

.

Idk what happened in my last post.

Mrs. Mallory Calorie!

(I used my new word format special for you!) Okay, so, Mrs. Calorie. If you have wondered what I think of you, well here it is. You are...so fucking amazing!!! :D You are the best because I can go to you when I feel like crying and jumping off a building (Ahhhhh!!!) And you make a smile like this, :( go to this, :D! I hope you are always happy forever and ever! Ilysfm Mal!

♥Your sister, Anna banana the girl that doesn't have a banana Get what I mean? ;D
Ha!

Imformation xD

Okay,Okay so uhm I cant post comments because this website is an ass -__- I also wanna write in a new word format or something so I dont know when but I'll do it soon. Secondly, My internet is goanna be shut off and I'm very pissed and some of you guys know but my phone is off too. DAMNIT. I'm very pissed. And lastly now when I write something I'm goanna put a heart :D so yeahhh.

:3 Bye. HAHAHA! BIG WORDS!

♡

My new religion is ;3

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Most Girls Blend In, But we perfer to make a scene.

Emilie Autumn quotes

"It gives me strength to have somebody to fight for; I can never fight for myself,but,for others,I can kill"

"I still own my heart,which I know because it hurts so much"

"You" he said,"Are a terribly real thing in a terribly false world,and that,I believe is why you are in so much pain."

"And falling is just another way to fly."

"Whats the big fucking idea?! Lots of amazing people have committed suicide and they turned out alright."

 "Nothing in my life has ever made me want to commit suicide more than people's reaction to my trying to commit suicide."

"I can explain myself: If you want to be safe, walk in the middle of the street. I’m not joking. You’ve been told to look both ways before crossing the street, and the sidewalk is your friend, right? Wrong. I’ve spent years walking sidewalks at night. I’ve looked around me when it was dark, when there were men following me, creeping out of alleyways, attempting to goad me into speaking to them and shouting obscenities at me when I wouldn’t, and I suddenly realised that the only place left to go was the middle of street. But why would I risk it? Because the odds are in my favour. In the States, someone is killed in a car accident on average every 12.5 minutes, while someone is raped on average every 2.5 minutes. Even when factoring in that, one, I am generously including ALL car-related accidents and not just those involving accidents, and two, that the vast majorities of rapes still go unreported […] And, thus, this is now the way I live my life: out in the open, in the middle of everything, because the middle of the street is actually the safest place to walk." 
"I smile to myself knowing that they may be dead." 
"For this freedom
I have given all I had
For this darkness
I gave my light
For this wisdom
I have lost my innocence
Take my petals
And cover me with the night" 
"Simply put, if you are a Wayward Victorian Girl, I'll find you." 
"Your stockings prove your virtues.
Be certain they are clean and free of tears."

 

The Endless Possibilities...

When you look into the eyes of a sweet little newborn baby,what do you think their future will turn out to be? I know. You think they will grow up to be sucsessful people. A movie star,a football player,a rockstar,a singer. Alot of things,the president,a buisness owner. Has the thought ever once poped in your'e mind. The horrible thought of your'e little "sweetheart" being a killer? A rapist? A physco? No. Never. Well,think of it. What if they turn out to be that way? Parents who have high expectations of their kids are heart broken when they see their little child who grew up so fast before their eyes go,and kill someone. Honestly,I think I would die inside and hate myself for not raising my child right. But also,is it really their fault? Sometimes,it is. Sometimes,it's not. We don't know this shit. We can't stop the future from happening. Like if the world ends in 2012,what the fuck can we do about it? NOTHING! Don't tell me that you can stop a world-wide flood. Don't tell me you can stop the sun from coliding into earth. So stop freaking out about the world ending and enjoy life while it lasts. Maybe you believe in reincarnation (i dont know if i spelled that right) but this may be the only life we ever get. I don't know. So basically I'm not saying enjoy life while your'e child is out killing people. But this is to all the parents who blame themselves and kill themselves for their child being a murderer. You can't stop the future. I mean if you don't witness the crazy shit they are doing,then,can you really blame yourself? No! But to the parents that do see it,why don't you just stop it instead of letting it slide? Im not saying you should be super strict on your kids. Im saying that if your kid is acting really crazy or depressed,take action before they do. Confront them before they kill themselves,or someone else.

Really Good Music :3

A list of really good songs

Bvb: Die for you,Knives and pens,fallen angels,perfect weapon.

Mcr: Na Na Na,Black Parade,Famous Last words,I'm not okay,Dead,Ghost of you.

Oomph (funny name I know): Labyrinth,Sandman. I'll listen to more songs of their's and tell you which ones are good.

The Birthday Massacure: Red Star,Blue,Kill the lights,In the dark,Pins and needles,In the dark.

Bless The Fall (Im kinda new to this band):What's left of me (favorite song EVER),Black rose dying. I'll post more songs of their's when I find some.

Misfits (I rarely ever listen to them): Crimson ghost,scream,dig up her bones.

Emilie Autumn:Liar,Shallott,Dead is the new alive,What if,Swallow (no it has nothing to do with sex),In the lake (relates to me ALOT),Opheliac,Organ Grinder,Unlaced,Maniac Depression,Face the wall,Misery Loves company,and almost all the rest of her songs. <3

Kerli: Butterfly Cry,Bulletproof,Love is dead,Walking on air,Creationist,Fragile,Goodbye,When nobodey loves you.

Those are all the music/bands/people I've been listening to lately. Listen to some of the songs and tell me what you think,kay? :)

Go to hell Michael! :D

I'm goanna start writing in big words now :) So I realized as long as I have my best freinds by my side,I don't need that cock sucker,Michael. So if you are reading this Michael,FUCK YOU,YOU STUPID MOTHERFUKING JIZZ EATER! WHO THE HELL GETS MAD WHEN SOMEONE TELLS YOU HOW THEY FEEL?! Sorry....I just had to get that off my mind....lol :) and hell no I won't die for that bitch! ^_^

Die for you...

I'd do this for him...</3

For Mikki :)

A poem made by Cherry :3 ....

"if you start to run with scissors all the gods will give you blisters if you start ta run with nives all teh gods will start to EAT CHUU!"

Tired Of It All.....

I made this poem....

I'm tired of feeling dead,I'm tired of emotional pain,I'm tired of saying,"I'm sorry," when I know I'm not the one to blame. Our love was special in the start but now I'm starting to believe he's just playing with my heart. He doesn't like to be told the truth. He doesn't like to know that he's to blame for all my sadness and pain. He cannot see what he has done to me,for I am not the girl I used to be.

Sure....I'll kill myself for him....I know damn right that he will never do the same. All the lies of saying he loves me and would die without me. I can't believe I actually fucking believed that. I'm such a fucking idiot. I need help. I need someone I can trust to help me out of this deep pain. But what's sad. Is the one person I trust....cannot know about our love. Therefore I cannot get help. He didn't believe me when I said I loved him. Love at our age is tossed around like a piece of fucking garbage. Careless boys breaking poor innocent girl's hearts. It's as if girls get more affected and hurt in love than the boys do. Some people are differant. He's long gone. But what scares the hell out of me is I don't think I can let go.

The most affective person to ever come in my life....

What has happened to me? Why couldn't I see? He's just goanna hurt me again. Why do I always give in? Why couldn't I just resist the temptation? Why couldn't I just have figured this out before he hurt me? Before pain? Before my broken heart. I honestly think nothing can fix it. I don't understand why I would let someone treat me like dirt and never say anything. My freinds all had a bad feeling about him. Why couldn't I listen to them? I know if I cry that that won't affect him. He feels no sarrowness towards me. No care. No love. Just coldness and hate. I never understood why people cut themselves. It just adds to the pain. But in time I realized that sometimes...people have no choice but to cut away at the pain. They think it just ends like that. But it doesn't. Hell is something we all should fear. But what I never understood was,if killing yourself will make all tha pain go away....than why is it considered a sin? I almost have ended my life before. Sad. Why would someone my age be so sad and miserable and go through hell? Why did he have to hurt me. After he said goodbye for the last time,my stomach was hurting. My heart had a pain in it like someone had hammered a nail into it. I felt sick to even think of food....People say writing poetry and stories is a great way to help ease the pain. For me,it's not working. I actually feel kinda bad because people...strangers are reading about my life. The life that no one ever thought I would live. Well,I guess I proved them wrong. I have 2 new cuts. I did it at 4:30 last night. If you are wondering if I am trying to seek attention,I'm not. People go on this website to read interesting things about people's lives. I'm not sure if mine is too interesting. Basically everything I talk about either relates to...him or sadness. So...yeah. Okay it's getting pretty long. I'd better stop or I'll bore you to death.